Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Reasons to Celebrate

It's a been a few weeks since my last post, but as promised to my husband, I wouldn't make this something that I felt compelled to do when I didn't have time, it would just be when I had something to share.  There have been some things that have taken place in the last 2 weeks that have once again caused me to reflect on my life and my family.  Two weeks ago we participated in our first Gigi's Playhouse 5K run/1 mile walk fundraiser.  As a team, we were able to raise over $5000 and came in third place! I'm not ashamed to say how impressed I was by this and how proud I am of my family and friends for their contributions of time, money, effort, and most of all love.  When we started the team and began spreading the word, I don't think in my wildest dreams did I ever think we could have raised that much.  But as I have said before, our little girl seems to have touched people in a way I never thought possible.  It was a beautiful day and we were joined by over 30 of our family and friends to participate in this great cause and I was so touched by everyone's generosity, if I had the time I would call each person who donated and/or joined us to thank them personally.  I can't wait to see what we can do next year :) 

The weekend after the walk was my husband's first Father's Day and I hope it as special to him as my first Mother's Day was.  We spent a quiet day at home as a family and it was wonderful to have that time together.  One of the most amazing things for me to watch lately is how much Tera has become attached to him.  She definitely seems to be comforted when he holds her after being at work all day and it almost makes me tear up when she just looks at him and breaks out into one of her huge smiles, as if to say, "Ahhh, my Dad!" I love watching them be silly together and make funny faces, and the looks of adoration at him make my heart want to just burst out of my chest with happiness.  It was a time in my life I've looked forward to for so long and so far there hasn't been a moment of disappointment. 
Yesterday we had her reevaluated by her EI team and while there are some things she still has to work on, she is still not far behind in general.  They will be recommending services for her to begin soon so that she doesn't fall behind as what is expected for her to be able to do increases.  She continues to amaze us everyday with what she does.  She moves constantly and we really do have to make sure she has time to wiggle and move each day.  She now loves to roll over and makes so many noises that when I'm talking on the phone she seems to genuinely want to be part of the conversation (so very much my daughter)! She's doing so much better with her head control and we're just amazed at much she's progressed just in the last week.  Her abilities now are what make me so glad we didn't know about the Down Syndrome until after she was born.  I know that had we known, I would have been reading and researching constantly and probably would have assumed that she would already be delayed and would have anticipated the worst case scenario of everything.  Instead we have this incredibly happy, active, amazing little girl who is doing some things ahead of typical babies her age and has relatively few medical issues.  It's just so reassuring to know how well is doing instead of having spent months agonizing over what could be happening and I wouldn't change my decision for anything.

And finally, this weekend we have her big debut celebration.  Neither of us being religious we did want her birth to be celebrated and after the outpouring of support and love from our family and friends, we wanted to give everyone a chance to meet our little stinker.  So we are having over 70 people to our house for our celebration of Tera.  I'm so excited for the rest of our families and friends to meet her and see what a special little person she is, and I won't lie, it's a reason for me to get her dressed up and get lots of pictures!

Everyday I wonder if I could love her more and I keep thinking it's not possible.  Even at 11:30 last night when she was waking up for the 3rd time since she had been put to bed, and I was frustrated because there didn't seem to be a reason why, and all it took was me picking her up and holding her to calm her down, I realized that that are worse things that could be happening than my little girl falling asleep on my shoulder because she was comforted by my holding her.  I don't know how long it will take, or if it will ever happen, but I swear I still don't believe she's ours.  I look at her and still wonder how we created her and how she grew inside me and it still doesn't sink in that she did in fact come from me and that she is the most amazing thing we have created together.  But I'll enjoy every realization that no matter how hard it is to believe, she's our little munchkin. 

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