Monday, April 30, 2012

I just want answers

Today we had an exhausting afternoon.  Tera had her appointment with the allergist for what I've assumed is part of her ongoing sinus and respiratory issues.  After a lengthy conversation about her health issues, they tested her for allergies to dogs, cats, mold, dust mites, mice, and roaches.  The good news is she isn't allergic to any of those things.  The bad news is I feel like we wasted our time and Tera's comfort for no new news. 

Today was one of those days when the frustration of everything became overwhelming.  She has so many issues that could be contributing to various health concerns, but we never know for sure what's causing what or even if anything we're thinking of has anything to do with anything else.  After waiting a half hour to see the doctor with a very antsy little girl and then an almost an hour total of questions, testing, and discussions, we found out she's not allergic to anything they would suspect and instead opted to do some blood work to eliminate any immune disorders that could be making her more susceptible to germs.  When the lab technician couldn't find her vein, we called it quits and said we'd get the blood work done at her pediatrician's office; we'd all been through enough. 

As we sat there waiting to be called for her blood work (before we decided to leave) it all kind of hit me again.  I'm tired of not knowing what's wrong with her.  I know we've been lucky because we haven't dealt with anything very serious, aside from the pneumonia, but it's so incredibly frustrating to keep guessing what might be the issue.  She's always congested it seems.  But is it a cold? I used to wonder about allergies, but apparently that's not the case.  Is it a sinus infection? Is it a cold that will inevitably turn into a sinus infection? Does she have the beginnings of a sinus infection currently that is causing her to cough a horrible nasty cough that makes me wonder if she'll get pneumonia again?

Half the times that I'm talking to a doctor I'm wondering if they're thinking I'm overreacting because I'm wondering the same thing too.  I read a lot of posts in my forum and for the most part I think it keeps me informed, but sometimes I wonder if it makes me jump to conclusions. But there are some things that I just don't like and I don't think she should have to live with.  I think there should be a reason why she's always congested.  If she gets these sinus infections so frequently, why is she getting them and shouldn't there be something we can do to alleviate them? I want to know a more definitive way of determining a sinus infection; it seems like even the doctors are kind of guessing some of the times.  I don't blame them for this, I'm aware that despite my wishes, there isn't a definitive test for sinus infections, it's just frustrating.  I don't think she should have to strain so regularly when she's trying to go to the bathroom.  It makes me want to cry knowing how uncomfortable she seems to be when she's trying. 

I know there no answers to these questions or solutions to these problems, I'm just freaking tired of not knowing anything besides the fact that she doesn't seem healthy.   I want to know how to know what's wrong with her, how to fix it, and how to make sure it doesn't happen again.  Tom and I both feel that there will be something wrong by the end of the week.  This is not negative thinking, it's just based on past experience.  It more than bothers me that her cough sounds just like it did when she had pneumonia and that she's been congested for so long.  The question is, when do I take her in again? The allergist said it's not a sinus infection yet, but that it could become one.  We'll see...

2 comments:

  1. Sorry Melissa for your sinus issues.It truly is a problem with our kids.Michael truly had constant problems and alot of allergies.Cats and dogs are huge.

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  2. I can so relate with how you are feeling!! Our Madi is congested ALL the time! She was sick from October until March. We found out she was silently aspirating and once we started thickening the liquids, she was MUCH better for about 6 weeks. And then came.....the allergies! Or at least we think. She has had so much drainage the last several weeks, she can't even breathe to eat or drink. :(

    Has Tera ever had a swallow study done? Could she be aspirating? I was totally against Madi having a swallow study due to the radiation but we were forced into it. Now, I am thankful that we found out she was silently aspirating.

    Hang in there, Mama!!!

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