Saturday, May 24, 2014

And we change our expectations again...

I've been trying to get a post written for two weeks now and this whole being pregnant, working full time, and having an overactive three year old are things that don't lend themselves to me getting things done that I want to do.

It's been an interesting, less than favorable two weeks, but we're surviving.  We had a rough patch of behavior with Tera both at home and at preschool which we think has started to improve with the implementation of behavior charts; it's amazing what a child will do for a sticker.  We're still not entirely sure what caused the change in behavior, but fortunately we have a working plan in place and we'll see how it goes.  Though I have to say, the past few days have been some of her best in a long time.  I'm really, really proud of her listening and behaving and all I can do is hope we've maybe rounded a corner and there will be more of these types of days to come.

Then a week ago Thursday I had my 20 week Level 2 ultrasound.  The good news is that the baby looks great.  Perfectly healthy in every way they can measure right now.  The less than great news is that apparently I have placenta previa.  For those who don't know, it is a condition that basically prevents me from being able to deliver naturally; it would have to be by c-section.  The condition can resolve itself, but apparently the position of the placenta currently, is not favorable for this happening.  So at this point, it could change, but there isn't a great chance.

So we've had to readjust our expectations yet again.  What exactly does this mean?  At 28 weeks they will do another ultrasound to see if the placenta has shifted and if it hasn't, my doctor will schedule a c-section and it will most likely be around 36 to 37 weeks.  This also means I more than likely won't be starting the school year, which has never been something I wanted to do.  We will have to shift my time off from the beginning of the year to probably around Thanksgiving, instead of October to winter break.

It means not delivering this baby the same way I delivered Tera; and as weird as it sounds, because her delivery was a piece of cake, that was the one thing I was looking forward to.  I loved that experience and while I consider myself very fortunate that I was able to experience it at all, because a lot of women don't, I will miss that part of it this time if this happens.

It may mean restricted activity following my ultrasound until the c-section.  It also means there is a possibility that if any complications arise between those times, I may have to deliver even earlier.

It means a more difficult recovery after the baby arrives than what I experienced with Tera, and it means that I'll have a very active three year old with special needs and a newborn along with recovering.  People do it all the time, and I know I can handle it, it just wasn't what I was expecting.

I know this isn't a done deal, but it's easiest for me to handle and prepare for if I assume this is what is going to happen.  It also means that there is a pretty good chance that this kid will be here in about 15 weeks or less.  And we don't have a whole lot done yet.  Sure 15 weeks sounds like a long time, but summer isn't usually one of those times of the year that drags on so we need to get our butts in gear and get ready for this little girl.  And for those of you wondering, while there have been name discussions, we aren't even close to an agreement on anything.

So per usual, never a dull moment.  I did get some fantastic images of the baby during the ultrasound and the one part I'm truly enjoying is being able to really feel her kick.  At 21 weeks I can't complain too much except that much like the last time, I'll be happier when it's done.